How to balance family and career?

Many women believe that it is not possible to balance career and family lifestyle and make the compromise to give up on their professional aspirations. In addition, the feelings of guilt, insecurity, a lower self-esteem and a negative vision of the future may become invisible stressors that silently tell you : ‘Don’t be selfish. It’s too late for a career now. Be realistic’.

However, there are ways to work towards balance that you should consider.

Cost of living

Some of my private clients say to me that when having two or more young children, it’s sometimes more expensive to return to work than staying at home and look after them. The cost of childcare is a huge concern in many Western European countries, such as the United Kingdom, France and Belgium.

Keep in mind that making the sacrifice to look after your children is a brave choice, but the more you isolate yourself socially and professionally, the greater is the risk to suffer from low self-esteem, feelings of insecurity and potentially other psychological problems. In addition, a poor mental health contributes to more irritability and less patience when looking after children. Often, family dynamics are better when the parents work.

Pay attention to your beliefs

There is a widespread misbelief saying that when a woman starts a family, she needs to take a step down in her career. You know what? This is not true. Starting a family doesn’t mean that a woman should only define herself as a mother and a wife. A woman has many roles and definitions. A woman can simultaneously be a mother, a wife, a friend, an employee, an entrepreneur, a sister, a daughter and much more. Women have as many definitions as they want. This means that they can fully explore each of them without feeling guilty or selfish.

When your children are little, spend time with them and then, come back to work and make things for yourself. There are no rights or wrongs. Think about what suits you – family, career or both. What suits someone else isn’t necessary the best option for you and there is no universal rule that says how things need to be.

Learn about your parental rights

In the United Kingdom for example, future mums are entitled to fifty-two weeks statutory maternity leave, no matter if they work part-time or full-time. Dads have the option to take paid shared parental leave.

Things are less straightforward when mums have their own businesses, but it’s not difficult to calculate your maternity allowance and to plan things ahead.

If you would like to learn more about work & career goals, don’t hesitate to email me on : info@angelpsychology.com. Supervision is an excellent method that helps you with your career. To learn more, please click here.

If you are already a mum and you wish to learn more about parenting and motherhood, access a wide range of articles here.

With warm wishes,

Dr Ivanka Ezhova

Founder of Angel Psychological Therapy – Online Psychological Therapy